Police armor…true asset or penis compensation?

It seems like Barry is selling Mine Resistant Ambush Protected (MRAP) vehicles that cost the taxpayer $600,000 per copy to every law enforcement agency across America, large and small, for the paltry sum of $2,000 each. At first glance, that would seem to be quite the bargain, but when the Conservative Collective considers that each vehicle has already been paid for with our money, why would any police chief be so stupid as to pay for one AGAIN…with taxpayer dollars?

Here is what we see on the nightly local news. Sheriff Bubba T. Dingleberry and his SWAT boys standing proudly next to his shiny new MRAP:


Badass isn’t it? But…why does the Salinas Police Department need that level of vehicle? Are terrorists running rampant? Are the streets littered with dead citizens? Are the police in Salinas running over a lot of mines or IED’s? Are Al-Queda ambushing officers from Salinas constantly? Why does Sheriff Bubbas MRAP need to be set up for a Browning M2 .50 caliber heavy machine gun?  Why in the hell does ANY law enforcement agency need military equipment to carry out its assigned duties? The Conservative Collective says…they don’t unless there are other motives at work.

Remember what Barry said at the very beginning of his first term? He said he wanted a federal police force that was as well funded and as well equipped…as the military. But why?

The answer is relatively straightforward and resides in law. Barry is denied the use of the military for domestic law enforcement purposes by our Posse Comitatus law. He cannot direct the military against civilians. But, there are no such limitations for his use of law enforcement across America. Barry owns Eric Holder, who in turn owns the Department of Justice, which can direct Americas police departments against us…well we all get it.

Recent history has shown us that in places like Boston, law enforcement storm troopers, emboldened by support from the DOJ, will commit constitutional violations day after day and they roll in those violations like a dog in poop. They train with the military, they think like the military now and they kill like the military when at war. But, who is law enforcement at war with, exactly?   Criminals? Don’t be stupid. The answer is…you and me.

And think about this…while law enforcement whines about their casualties going up by 40%, no one brings up the fact that since 9/11 America’s law enforcement has killed over 5,000 civilians. That happens to be more than the number of soldiers killed in Iraq and Afghanistan in ten years. Worse, they kill us and then congratulate themselves with high-fives for a job well done. Make no mistake, these MRAPs are meant to scare the living bejeezuz out of us, not to protect officers lives.

The Conservative Collective as well as other concerned groups such as The Cato Institute have watched the escalation of police militarization with extreme interest. We also find it interesting that Sheriff Bubba never shows what happens when a MRAP happens along someone who does not like MRAPs. It looks like this;

mrapdestroyedNot so shiny is it? Not nearly as impressive when its been turned inside out by someone who isn’t  afraid of armor and really doesn’t like MRAPs rumbling down the street in their neighborhood. In this case, in Iraq or Afghanistan.

The other option is that Sheriff Bubba has a tiny penis and is merely trying to over-compensate by having the biggest pickup truck in the county. At any other time in history, this would be the more likely scenario.

If the U.S. had any money, at least it would be clean

For the past six years, Barry and his administration has been engaged in the largest money laundering operation in the history of the United States of America, and the Conservative Collective defies anyone to prove differently.

omoneylaunderIn very simplified form, here is how Barry is funding his favorite progressive organizations, including his own election coffers.

Let’s say, for example, a fictitious environmental  group known as the Green Assholes wants to refill its bank account with two million squeaky clean dollars courtesy of the US taxpayer. The Green  Assholes simply manufacture a complaint. In our example we might pretend that Barry’s windmills in California are wiping out endangered birds. Oh wait…we don’t have to pretend…because…they really are!

Attorneys for the Green Assholes simply file a two million dollar lawsuit against the Environmental Protection Agency and then they wait. After a suitable amount of mutually agreed-upon time, the EPA decides not to fight the law suit and settles with the Green Assholes for two million dollars. The money is transferred, and BADA-BING! the deal is done. Then, these (501)C3’s turn around and cut Barry’s campaign banker a check for thousands upon thousands of laundered dollars.


Can’t be true and the Conservative Collective is simply a right-wing shill. Well, let them that think so get off their fat, lazy asses and prove it! What we have learned through research (that’s what getting off the couch, closing the supersized bag of cheese balls and looking up facts on your own is called) is that over 60 of these cases have been settled since Barry became the Puke in Chief.

America is being drained of it’s blood and Barry is the Islamic mosquito. The most bizarre part is, that while half of America’s population have become Barrys’ little plantation EBT bitches, most of the other half don’t seem to give a crap as long as they can stuff jalapeno poppers into their fat pie holes once a weekend and watch feces like Honey Boo Boo.

The Conservative Collective knows that bringing this to the attention of morons who don;t know the name of their own Senator is of little use at this point, so we’ll leave you with one more “fun fact”. Did any of you know that only 3% of the population actually had the courage to stand up and fight the British during the First American Revolution?

Today, that would translate to roughly 3.5 million angry Americans. A sizable force to be reckoned with we think.


America…open your eyes and SEE!!!!!

The Conservative Collective is convinced that America is afflicted with a national blindness. It seems to stem initially from a widespread cowardice of 50% of the population. Apparently, 50% of the American population do not have the balls to take care of themselves, relying entirely upon Barry to stuff Twinkies into their mouths while they watch television in their Escolades. What piss-poor examples of humanity…

What’s worse is that this 50% is raising even more piss-poor examples of humanity with the blessing of Barry, Al Sharpton, Chuck Schumer and the rest of the progressive slime that infects our land.


Barry has made his voting minions so stupid and so bloated with taxpayer dollars that they are now allowing him to bring terrorists into our country, free criminals, piss on the memories of the bravest among us, ignore the same laws that the rest of us must obey, create a national police force that will enslave us, destroy the very industries that made the US great and rape the foundations of our religious beliefs.


However, Islam IS at war with us, By definition then, we are in a conflict, but our leadership is sympathetic to the enemy. Barry is an enemy of the state if for no other reason that he sympathizes with ISIS, the Muslim Brotherhood, HAMAS and many other organizations that have sworn to kill Americans. Barry is no American and if everyone reading this thinks otherwise, you are stupid beyond words, or a confederate of Barry’s.

  • Bowe Bergdahl will kill Americans…
  • The five murderers traded for Bergdhal will kill Americans…
  • The fall of Iraq because of Barry will kill Americans…
  • The rise of Iran to nuclear status because of Barry will kill Americans…
  • The fall of Afghanistan because of Barry will kill Americans…
  • The destruction of American industry will kill Americans…
  • Obamacare will kill Americans…

Most of the rest of America is no better. Even those who oppose Barry the Wilted do not have the personal courage to engage in the battle for America. Sadly, most Americans are perfectly fine for others to make the sacrifices that allow them to enjoy freedom. What pathetic little cowards YOU are in the eyes of us who are going to die for America! Then there are those who boast that when the time comes, they will fight and show Barry a thing or two! Again, what impotent little cowards they are! Talking big talk around the office water cooler, but growing a yellow streak and running like a rabbit when the fight comes!

Open your eyes America. A reckoning IS coming…it’s too late to stop that.

How to identify a progressive voter

Some folks have asked members of the Conservative Collective if it possible to identify a progressive voter and if so, what precisely does one look for for the purposes of said identification? The answer is a loud and resounding YES!…and here is a representative example:


From this date to November, this is what one should look for when attempting to identify those specific traits that can be utilized for identification. It should be noted however, that actual individual voters can be of any race or any (or both) gender.

What is important to note is not so much the coloration, as the circular red, white and blue design will be gone after the year 2016. It is the pathetic, whining call of the progressive that is the same regardless of coloration. It is very easy to hear and sounds like…”Wherezz my freee stuuffff”. The call is constant and never varies in pitch, but is certain to gain volume as election season nears.

While there are sub-species of progressive voters that sit on issues like climate change, gun control or killing innocent unborn babies, the baseline call of the progressive never changes…

.”Wherezz my freee stuuffff”

Political wildlife 2014


After a brief respite, what better way for the Conservative Collective to begin the 2014 mid-term political cycle than to introduce some of the better known political figures who will be embroiled in the fight for our votes in November.

The group portrait from the House of Representatives above shows, from left to right, Rep. Eric Cantor, Speaker of the House John Boehner, and Rep. Peter King.  The entire Conservative Collective could not find a picture of these three progressives together, so it was decided to use a photo of real weasels, as it was assumed that no one would have known the difference anyway.


The next photo is a group portrait taken from the Senate and the other side of the isle and shows, from left to right, Sen. Nancy Pelosi, Sen. Dick Durbin, Sen. Charles Schumer and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid.

These four can stink up a legislative agenda faster than Uncle Purvis  after eating a week-old burrito. Actually, apologies are in order to the skunks in the picture for even suggesting that they smell like politicians.

So there it is…weasels and skunks. That’s what constitutes our nations legislative body, and yet America stupidly keeps voting for them. Eric Cantor has proven he can lie with a straight face about illegal immigration, so we guess that’s what qualifies him for office.

Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi are simply brain-dead progressive zombies who march in lock-step to any orders that come from the White House. Peter King would have America believe that he’s a defender of the republic, when in reality he’s a defender of the progressives who make up the Republican “Old Guard”. Charles Schumer has been assembling deceitful schemes for decades and is simply not to be trusted at any time…period.

Lastly, be very aware of this final creature as it winds its way into and out of the shadows. It’s direction is always to the progressive left, but its path twists and turns as it avoids telling the truth to the American people. Fortunately we can always tell where it came from because it leaves a nasty slime trail. Here it is going to Air Force One as it leaves on yet another taxpayer-paid vacation. We call it…

slime trail